Day 31 - Weight Loss Diary - Head in the Game

It's Day 31 of my daily weight loss diary blog - 203.9. I had a wonderful dinner with my inlaws last night. It was decadent but I didn't go insane. A couple of glasses of wine and I had the fish, which was amazing. I am so excited for tomorrow morning because I am going running! For the first time in a week and a half. I'm nervous about my calf. It feels pretty good and like I can run on it. I just don't want to reinjure it. I am going to take it easy for sure. I'll let you know how it goes!

Day 30 - Weight Loss Diary Blog - Countdown

It's Day 30 of my daily weight loss diary blog. 203.4. Do you think I can lose 4 pounds by Tuesday? Probably not but I'm sure gonna try.

I have a fancy dinner out tonight to a winery with my in-laws for my birthday and my Father-in-law's birthday. It's a really sweet tradition we started because we have birthdays within a week of each other and then we do it again in the Fall for my husband's and his stepmom's (my step-mother-in-law) birthdays which are also relatively close. I am so lucky that I have in-laws that I love and enjoy spending time with. That is including my husband's mom too. Some people struggle with one mother-in-law. I have two and they rock.

I have a family picnic tomorrow with my side of the family...another food trap. I am going to stay strong and do my best to lose these last 4 pounds. If I don't meet my goal (losing it by my birthday on July 3), I am going to come up with a new strategy.

Days 28 and 29 - Weight Loss Diary Blog - Culinerapy

It's Day 29 of my daily weight loss diary blog - 203.9. Yesterday I weighed in on Meg's scale at 205.7. Last night was my last overnight in the city, for now. I will miss Meg and her wondercat, Moxie. But I will be happy to be home more, that's for sure! Next week is finals and then I start a new quarter with new classes and new students - and a new (AND WAY BETTER) schedule!

I am still babying my calf, icing it and taking Aleve and will try to run on it on Sunday. For now I am doing modified bootcamp (I've been calling it one legged bootcamp) and biking. I am resting today though because it feels like a convection oven outside.

I posted this pic on Facebook earlier - with the post: "Icing my calf with frozen haricot vert and thinking about all of the ways I want to cook them. Culinerapy?"

The real stars of this photo are not the hericot vert, nor my poorly painted toes. Not even my semi-folded laundry. No, they're the beasts...Fifi (orange one on the left) and Pod (on my lap). Talk about therapy!

I actually really like the idea of "Culinerapy" - coping the culinary way. One of the ways I've been working on my weight loss is with my therapist and figuring out coping mechanisms that aren't eating! But maybe there are other things I can do with food to make my life better? Food is already my blessing (my livelihood) and my curse (hello, I wasn't on a show called FAT CHEF for nuthin'). Using frozen hericot vert to ice my calf while developing recipes using the little beauties for upcoming books or newsletters was very productive! 

What other ways can we use food that isn't "eating" it per se? Thoughts my brilliant readers?

Day 26 - Weight Loss Diary Blog - Stupid Calf (not the baby cow)

It's Day 26 of my daily weight loss diary blog. Still 205.6. My calf still hurts but it is not as badly. I went to bootcamp last night and did as much as I could, one legged. I was able to do almost everything except jumping jacks. I jumped rope on one leg (not fun) and the rest of it was mostly upper body stuff so I lucked out. I biked today - 11 miles. My calf felt great during the bike and then I tried walking on it afterward...not so much. Aleve and ice. Aleve and ice. Aleve and ice. I'd better be able to run on Sunday...I'm giving it til then to get better or it's gonna get it! Stupid Calf.

Okay, this is a stupid calf. Almost as stupid as mine. Photo Source

Day 25 - Weight Loss Diary - Stress

It's Day 25 of my daily weight loss diary blog - 205.6 still today. I am super stressed right now over a myriad of things, but mostly because I still have this pulled muscle in my calf and can't run. My 1/2 Marathon training was supposed to start this week. I am going to put it off until this calf is healed but it is making me crazy not being able to run. Running also helps my stress level and so I'm feeling sort of off the charts mental today.

Many of you have asked me what my training looks like for the 1/2 marathon. Here it is:

Days twenty-three and twenty-four Weight Loss Diary Blog

It's Day Twenty Four of my daily weight loss diary blog. Yesterday I was 204.6 and today I was 205.6. My 30 year reunion was last night and it was a complete blast. It was so good to see everyone and catch up with old friends. It felt like old times just with a bigger and better perspective on life. I am exhausted tonight, hence the late post. Til tomorrow!

CORRECTION: It was my 20 year reunion, not 30! Ha! I was so tired writing this!

Day 22 - Weight Loss Diary Blog - Nostalgia

It's Day 22 of my daily weight loss diary blog! 203.9 today...like it.

I really pulled that  muscle in my calf. I tried running this morning and couldn't which made me super crabby...so much so that my neighbor and running friend asked me if I had PMS. Since I had to stop running, we went kayaking on a beautiful part of the Fox River and it put me in a much better mood.

Then I got to have lunch with a old friend who is in town for the reunion. She is just (or more) beautiful as she was in High School and so incredibly nice, again, as she was in High School. It was wonderful catching up with her. It's so funny, because I told her how much I admired her in high school and how beautiful I always thought she was and she said to me, "I wish you would have told me that back then, I was so insecure." I was like, "YOU WERE INSECURE!?!" She was like a supermodel and I remember envying her so much. It just goes to show that you never know what others are going through and we sure as hell wasted a good part of our youth worrying about stupid shit. I was so happy to see her and reconnect and cannot wait for my 20 year reunion tomorrow night. I can't wait to see what the evening brings!

Day Twenty-One - Weight Loss Diary Blog - Feeling Good

It's Day Twenty-One of my daily weight loss diary blog. 205.4. Going back down...good!

The weekend and 20 year reunion is looming and I don't want to go completely off the rails like I did last weekend.

I am feeling really nostalgic so I started flipping through all of my old photo albums. I've always loved taking photos and as much as I love digital photography and having everything readily available at my fingertips, I do miss actual photographs and putting together photo albums. I don't have the patience to "scrapbook" per se, but I do love flipping through all of my old albums. And I have a lot of them. I guess I've always been an observer and have always loved documenting life.

I'm actually not in a ton of my own photo albums, it's mostly my friends and family, but it is always fun to look back. What struck me today looking at these photos is how long I have been friends with my closest friends. To look back twenty years and constantly see the same faces is such a comfort.  I am blessed with wonderful group of friends in my life who are smart, beautiful, and hilarious. I'm a lucky girl. Add my husband to that mix and my cup runneth over.

So, I am looking forward to catching up with some other old friends this weekend, seeing what everyone is up to and having a great time. These days, it's easier to keep up with people because of Facebook, etc. but it will be great to actually see everyone in person.

At the end of my run yesterday I started feeling like I pulled a muscle in my right calf. I am babying it today because I don't want to actually injure it. I think it's just a strained muscle but I can't afford an injury right now. Too focused! So, lots of Aleve, ice and staying off of it. I have to teach tonight but I am just going to be careful.

Day Twenty - Weight Loss Diary - Focus!

It's Day Twenty of my daily weight loss diary blog and I did not weigh in this morning. I was in the city overnight again and AGAIN forgot to get my friend's scale from her bathroom before I went to bed.

Did Freud say "there are no accidents." Maybe I didn't forget...maybe I was just being lazy.

My birthday is looming and I fear I'll never reach my goal. Been on track all week food-wise so far and had a very hot run today in the city on the lakefront. Happily, on my way back from my run, Buckingham Fountain was spouting and the wind helped offer a nice spray so I ran through it and cooled off a bit. I even laughed while I did it along with all of the little kids who were running through it. It was a nice moment and a reminder that you have to stop and smell the roses every once in a while (or run through a fountain spray).

Day Nineteen - Weight Loss Diary - 20 Years

It's Day Nineteen of my daily weight loss diary blog - 208.1 this morning. Yuck (actually I said a work that rhymes with Yuck but starts with an "F" very loudly this morning when I weighed in). The weekend is really catching up with me.

I did a hard bootcamp last night and went on a long and hot bike ride today. Been logging the grub religiously the last two days and will continue to do so all week.

The problem? My 20 year high school reunion is this weekend at a brewery. Shit. It's going to be a blast...seeing people I haven't seen in 20 years and feeling great about myself. If my reunion was last year at this time, I honestly don't know if I would have gone because I was so miserable about my weight. I probably would have been talked into going but I would have been a wreck about it. Now, I am just happy that I am happy with myself and can concentrate on reconnecting with old friends rather than worrying about if they are going to judge me or not.

Oh the late eighties, early nineties...how tacky you were!

20 years is a very significant number for me. It's about how long I've been struggling with obesity. I was overweight in high school a little but my real issues started my senior year into my freshman year of college when my dad died - 20 years ago. I haven't been under 200 pounds in 20 years. 20 YEARS. It seems like such a long time but it also feels like it went by in a flash. How am I going to my 20 year reunion? It is pretty monumental to me that in this 20th year of my struggles that I am on the road to fixing this issue I have been battling with for so long. 20 years. I hope in 20 years from now, I can look back at this and celebrate 20 years of a healthy life.

Days 16, 17 and 18 - Weight Loss Diary - Bad Girl

I was a bad girl this weekend and I couldn't face the music. I weighed in on Saturday and was 203.7...yay! Then I had Dinner Club Saturday night and went a little nuts. The food was actually quite healthy (minus the cake balls, of which I ate three), but I drank a lot of wine. I actually ended up staying the night because I couldn't drive. It was pretty funny the next morning doing the "walk of shame" with my dress rolled up in a ball in a plastic grocery bag and sheepishly walking to my car wearing my friend Meg's sweats and my high heels from the night before. I'm sure I looked a spectacle but at least it was innocent enough. I came home and crashed then went to Indiana to see my family and ate a lot there, too.

So, I weighed in this morning and was 207.4. Eeeep. Paying the piper. I don't think I actually gained 4 pounds in two days, but I am bloated and gross from pretending like was a member of the Rolling Stones (circa 1980) this weekend. It's fun to party like a rock star every once in a while though, even if afterwards I look like Mick Jagger (circa 2012).

I did run with the Fox Valley Marathon training group this weekend. I did well...ran about an 11 and a half / 12 minute mile for 5 miles. Running with strangers makes me super agitated though and I am not sure I will go back. Everyone was nice enough but I am so mental when I run and being with strangers makes me a little nutso and is reminiscent of when I trained with the Boston Marathon runners 10 years ago for the Indianapolis Half Marathon and promptly quit running. My therapist really earns her money with me.

Day 15 - Weight Loss Diary - Jamboree

It's Day 15 of my DWLDB - 204.5. Last night's class was a Food Jamboree. I took some pics so you can get a visual of how much food I am surrounded by in this class.

These are my "tasting plates" - each group give me 2-3 small plates that I can taste and critique for grading. Most of these are more than one bite and they are so yummy. On these platters (clockwise starting in upper left corner): Hericot Vert and Fennel Salad, Fried Oyster Po'Boy Sandwich, Jambalaya and Cheddar Grits, Bread Pudding with Bourbon Sauce, Paneed (fried) Chicken with fresh Fettucine, Leeks with Hollandaise Sauce, Shrimp and Chicken etoufee, Shrimp Bisque, Fried fish with Remoulade Sauce, Glazed Carrots, Red Beans and Rice, Gumbo and Rice. Whew! That's a lot of frickin' food.

Okay, so that's the food that I taste. I try not to eat all of it, but it's damn hard.

This is what the students put out for everyone to eat from:

That's a lot of food!

I'm doing my first training run for the Fox Valley Half Marathon tomorrow with a training group. I'm normally not a fan of running with training groups because I'm slow and it makes me a little mental. Okay, a lot mental. I'll see how the first one goes. It's 5 miles and it's supposed to be hot, but it's at 6:30 a.m. so I think I'll be okay. I've done the distance but not with strangers. I just need to stay focused on me and not worry about anyone else.

Day Fourteen - Weight Loss Diary - Yo!

Yo! It's Day Fourteen of my daily weight loss diary blog (or the DWLDB). 204.6. Finally, the post-tri bloat fest is deflating. I feel like such a Yo-Yo, though. Am I ever going to get below 200?

Tonight is going to be tough class...Cajun and Creole food. Yum. In this class (American Regional Cuisine), the students work in three teams to execute three different menus and have to either plate the food like they would at a restaurant or set up a buffet. Everyone sits in the dining room and tastes all of the food and we talk about cooking techniques, local ingredients to that region and customs and traditions of that region. It is a really cool class and all of my students are awesome. It's always interesting and the food is always good. It is so hard not to overeat.

My strategy lately has been to have them make me a very small tasting plate of each of their dishes (which leaves me with 10-12 tasting plates) and I take my tasting plates in the dining room and just eat those while the students hit the buffet. I critique the food (too salty, not salty enough, meat doneness is just right, overdone, underdone, etc.) and tell myself I am only going to eat what is on my tasting plate and not go up for seconds. I make them, literally, give me one bite of food of each of their dishes so it really equates to about a full meal, sometimes a little more. If I go up for seconds, well, that's way overdoing it.

Last week I went up for seconds just of the meat (lamb roast) and fish (halibut) and had a little extra soba noodles. I try to avoid seconds anything fried, or "white" (rice, bread, potatoes, etc.) and have been okay at it. Tonight will be tough. I love Cajun food.

Yesterday, with the cookies, it was easier not to taste anything in class because I was grading them more on the technique and the doneness of all of the cookies as well as the decorating. I didn't have to taste them to grade them. If I don't have to taste at all, it's much easier not to eat the food. It's the little tiny taste that whets my palate and then, well, it's 1000 times more difficult. Especially the savory food. I love sweets but can live without them. Try to take away crunchy, salty, chewy, meaty, cheesy food from me and, well, you may draw back a bloody stump.

I am so lucky because I love my job but it sure makes this whole weight loss thing difficult. But, I had this same problem when I wasn't a chef, so, I really can't blame my job. I mean, I know a lot of healthy, fit chefs. I will figure this out and, yes, the taking the stairs can help (a la Robert's solution on Fat Chef for me) but I need to learn to control myself too. I want the change more than I want the food. I have to remember that. Tell that to the Shrimp Etoufee looming in my future. 

Day Thirteen - Weight Loss Diary - Fail

It's Day Thirteen (on the 13th no less!) of my daily weight loss diary blog and my weight is...um...I forgot to weigh in the morning.

I told you last week how I stay the night in the city on Tuesday nights because I teach late on Tuesdays and then really early on Wednesdays. It's a 45 mile drive each way, so...I stay in the city. I was so tired last night that I forgot to ask Meg if I could take her scale into the bathroom I use in the morning and so, well, I forgot to weigh in. I didn't want to go tip-toeing into her bedroom, past her bed into her bathroom to try and snag the scale. First of all, if she woke up and saw me tip-toeing past her bed, that would be creepy and second of all, she has an adorable and totally insane cat who I didn't want to disturb. It was 5:30 a.m., after all. So, I didn't weigh in. Bad me.

I feel less puffy today, though, and I've been surrounded by effing cookies and cupcakes all day and I didn't touch a g-damn one of them. And I went running. Phew, I'm exhausted. I get to sleep in tomorrow, thank God! But my night class is making Cajun and Creole food tomorrow...not going nuts on that food will be WAY harder than avoiding the cupcake and cookie extravaganza that's going on around here right now.

Day Twelve - Weight Loss Diary - Water Balloon

It's Day Twelve of my daily weight loss diary blog! 208.2...UGH! I woke up so swollen this morning, I looked like I had been injected with water. My face looked like a water balloon. Yuk! I am hoping that the post-triathlon-refueling-and-hydration-extravaganza will start to wear off soon and I will feel normal again.

I experienced the hugest boost to my ego today. My dear friend, Meg, is a 5th grade teacher at an elementary school on the West Side of Chicago and she invited me to spend the day with her 5th graders and do a cooking project with them based on Roald Dahl's (author of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, James and the Giant Peach, etc.) cookbook, "Revolting Recipes." Part of the cooking project was that the students had to research me and do a PowerPoint presentation on my work and life. OMG I was dying! They were so flattering and so adorable. It was both surreal and touching at the same time. I felt like such a rockstar. I happen to big on the 5th grade circuit, who knew! ;-)

At the end of the day, one of the kids gave me a homemade bookmark she made for me and as I was leaving they were shouting, "We love you Chef Jen". I wanted to die it was so frickin' cute. Holy shit, though, there is no way I could do that every day for a living. I was exhausted by the end of the day. I don't know how Meg and all of the other elementary, middle and high school teachers do it. You have to be a special kind of person to dedicate your life to teaching children and I am in awe.

Check out some of these PowerPoints, they are so adorable:

Love the "Eye of the Tiger"

One of the kids asked me for my autograph...I was dying! It was so sweet!

Damn Right!

Worlds Greatest Chef! Come on!!!!! How frickin' cute is that. 

Pretty? Seriously, my heart was bursting.

Days Ten and Eleven - Weight Loss Diary Blog

I missed posting yesterday because of the Batavia Triathlon (I even forgot to weigh in because I was so focused on the race). Today I weighed in at 207.5 which is a huge jump from Saturday. I know, though, that it is because of the race yesterday. I was am so full of water, Gatorade, salt and pancakes from yesterday and am beyond bloated so I knew my weight would be high today. Hopefully in the next couple of days it will go back down and then continue to go down. I am going to write about the triathlon in a separate blog post but I wanted to get this one out there, especially since I forgot yesterday. The race was amazing and I can't wait to tell you all about it! In the meantime, here's a little pic from yesterday!

DONE!

Day Nine - Weight Loss Diary Blog - 545th Place

Day Nine of my daily weight loss diary blog - 203.2. Like it...one of the only times when losing is good. Well, that's not true, really. I came in last place in the Batavia Triathlon last year. 545th place to be exact. So I lost. BIG TIME. But did I really? Some people consider anything other than first place losing. I sure as hell don't. I finished. And because I finished, I won. And I will win again tomorrow. Maybe not a medal. Maybe not a trophy. Maybe not even in the top 500. But I will finish. I will win. And I'll keep going on Monday. I can't believe it's been a year since I began this journey. More than that, really. It's amazing what can happen in a year. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. It's supposed to be 90 degrees tomorrow. I will need them.

What a difference a year makes!

Day Eight - Weight Loss Diary - NERVOUS!

It's Day Eight of my daily weight loss diary blog - 204.1. I am SO NERVOUS about the Triathlon on Sunday. I have had a super busy week and a super busy weekend and I am so unorganized for this triathlon. Last year by this time, I had my prep list done, and I was nervous but ready. This year...I don't even know where my bathing suit is right now. Holy crap!

Here I am coming into the finish of the 2011 Batavia Triathlon last year...laughing, bawling, barely able to breathe. Wonder what this year will be like?

Day Seven - Weight Loss Diary - Bleh

 It's Day Seven of my daily weight loss diary blog. I am at 204.9. Bleh is all I can say. I am not letting myself get mental over it, though.

I am not really working out this week because the Batavia Triathlon is Sunday and I am saving my legs for the 400m Swim, the 14.7 mile bike ride and the 4.1 mile run. Whew, it's going to be tough. I am stressed to say the least.

I am working on keeping my head in the game but it's very difficult to lose weight when you're not working out, unless you are starving yourself and who the hell wants to do that? I couldn't starve myself even if I wanted to (and again, who the hell would want to?) because of my job. I have to taste my students' food for a living and dammit if they aren't all doing really well this quarter and cooking some kick-ass food. Poor me, right?


Be sure to join me and my local "Fat Chef on Food Network" trainer, Chris Hylton of River West Family Fitness at the Batavia Green Walk 2012 on Friday, June 8 from 5-8 in downtown Batavia, Illinois. I'll be doing cooking demonstrations and Chris will lead one of his FAMOUS Bootcamp classes at 6:30 in the bandshell. Hope to see you there!

Day Six - Weight Loss Diary - Mental

It's Day Six of my daily weight loss diary blog! Okay, before I post my weight, I have a little disclaimer. I weighed myself on a different scale this morning. Because of my teaching schedule, I stay the night in the city on Tuesday nights because I teach late on Tuesday night and early on Wednesday morning. It's a 45 mile drive each way to home from work, so one of my dear friends lets me crash in her spare bedroom on Tuesday nights.

So, anyway, I weighed in on her scale at 205.6 this morning. I'm trying not to be mental about it. I will see what is on my scale tomorrow. Til then!

Day Five - Weight Loss Diary - Positive Thinking

It's Day Five of my daily weight loss diary blog - 202.4! Holy crap, what the hell is going on? I haven't lost a pound in two months and this week I've lost 5. WTF?

I wish I could say I've been working out like a madwoman and eating nothing but grilled fish and broccoli but that's so far from the truth. I have been working out regularly, but not excessively at all. I have also been very conscience of what I've been eating and logging most of it, but again, not super regimented.

I have to think it's a couple of factors that are contributing to the weight loss. One is booze. I stopped indulging in my wine and Skinnygirl Margaritas on the weekends. It is rare that I ever drink during the week but on the weekends, I love sitting on my deck with my beloved and our friends and drinking wine or cocktails. However, I'm not really a one-glass-of-wine-kinda-girl and I tend to want several glasses. Several glasses usually leads to overeating and I think that has become my cycle the last couple of months. Now, I'm not saying I'll never drink again, but until I get to my goal, I am going to have to stay a teetotaler except for very special occasions. While depressing, I want this change more than I want Sauvignon Blanc (most days at least). Sigh. 

The other factor, I think, is positive thinking. I know that sounds like I'm an Oprah-drone hippy, but I have to say, I really do believe it. Whether you believe in God, or the Universe, or Budda, or all of it, or whatever it is you believe in, I really feel like me writing this blog and putting it out there that I am going to do this and having some faith is helping me make it happen. I have been in a really bad place the last two months and finally feel like I am coming out of it. Positivity really makes a difference in my life and when I feel positive, positive things happen. I'm not saying I have a vision board and light candles to a picture of size 8 pants or anything, but I am being nicer to myself and focusing on the change in my life rather than what I'm not accomplishing. That has to count for something, right?

Day Four - Weight Loss Diary - Focus

It's Day Four of my daily weight loss diary blog and I am at 204.2. Steadily going down which is what I want to see!

Opposite of most people, I am more regimented and can focus more on my weight loss and fitness goals on the weekend rather than during the week. With my teaching schedule and my commute it has been very hard for me to stay consistent with eating, especially with teaching Baking and Pastry as well as American Regional Cuisine. Both classes result in loads of very yummy and unhealthy food. My other class I am teaching, Garde Manger, has equally delicious food but does not have the variety or quantity that these other two classes have and it's more manageable to not over eat in that class. Except for last week when we did a cheese tasting and made cheese. I LOVE CHEESE!

Cheese tasting plate - starting at 12 o'clock - Brie, Aged Cheddar, Horseradish Cheddar, Manchego, Same Manchego with Fig and Black Tea Preserves, Raw Sheep's Milk Manchego, 5 Year Aged Gouda, Smoked Gouda with Cumin, St. Agur Bleu (the best bleu cheese I've ever had in my life) and Extra Sharp Vermont Cheddar.

Day Three - Weight Loss Diary - Designate this!

Day Three of the daily weight loss diary blog. 204.4 this morning. It's really early and I'm on my way to run the Ronald McDonald House/Hope Children's Hospital 5K in honor of little Elizabeth Grice, the 3 year old daughter of my dear friend Sandy who we lost on May 20. It's going to be a beautiful and sad day. I'm going for a running PR in honor of this little sweetie pie and her amazing family. They truly are the strongest people I know.

Last night we went to the Hop Juice Fest at Two Brothers Brewery in Aurora and I was the designated driver for my husband and several neighbors. Being the designated driver is an honorable and important job. Oh, and, yeah, it totally sucks. Especially when it includes a late night run to a taco stand. I did have a couple of bites of my husband's burrito and more than a handful of tortilla chips. I called it carb loading for today. Ha! I hope my stomach holds out.

Anyway, downward I go! Wish me luck on the race and please keep the Grice family in your thoughts and prayers today.

BLOG UPDATE!
The 5K was beautiful and fun. The Team Elizabeth runners and walkers were such a wonderful tribute to this darling little girl and her incredible family. The fact that her parents (my friends Sandy and Paulie) were there and did the walk really speaks to how unbelievably strong they are.

I did not PR (was going for 32 minutes) but I still, unofficially, did 33 minutes and 44 seconds, which to me is still a fantastic run! It was tough but I can tell my asthma is getting better.

One of  best parts of this race other than the tribute to Elizabeth was that one of my dear friends, Amy, ran her first 5K. She started using the Couch to 5k app on her iPhone (the active.com app) and she ran the whole thing and sprinted like a bullet into the finish. It was so amazing! She totally rocked it and I was so proud of her!

Me and Amy after the race. She was awesome.

My next race is the Batavia Triathlon this Sunday! I can't believe it's here already. I am so excited and nervous for it. Til tomorrow!

Day Two - Weight Loss Diary - What The?

So it's Day Two of my daily weight loss diary blog. The last time I weighed myself was Monday morning and I was at 207.4. I weighed myself this morning and I was at 204.6. What the????? Whatever, I'll take it. Can't explain it, but I'll take it.

I'm getting ready to head over to Saturday morning bootcamp, which is always killer, then it's housework and yardwork all day today. Both good calorie burners, though. We're going to the Hop Juice Festival tonight at Two Brothers in Aurora. I will be the DD (designated driver) because I'm off booze until my birthday to help get to the new decade. Should be fun?

On a Mission

Wow, it's been a long time since I blogged. Two months to be exact. I haven't been feeling inspired to write at all and I'm not sure why. Writing is usually the first way I go to express myself...texts, emails, blog posts, Facebook and Twitter posts...writing is usually the way that I express myself best. But lately - pretty uninspired.

I've had a lot of upheaval lately (good and bad) and I am feeling unraveled. Everything is fine, I am just working on adjusting to a new schedule at work, teaching more (thus eating more), a bathroom remodel, taking over the Presidency of Les Dames d'Escoffier (a huge milestone in my career) and some family and friends who are suffering and in need of my support. Some incredible things, some heartbreaking things, including the loss of a dear friend's three year old daughter.

Dear Sweet Elizabeth Grice, 3, who went home to God on Sunday, May 20.
Her mom, Sandy, is a dear friend of mine and we are all running and walking in the Ronald McDonald House/Hope Children's Hospital 5K this Sunday, June 3. The RMH was Sandy and her husband Paulie and their oldest daughter, Abigail's, home for a long time during little Elizabeth's many surgeries. If you are interested in donating to Team Elizabeth Grice to benefit the Ronald McDonald House/Hope Children's Hospital Charity, please visit this web site: http://www.active.com/donate/runningforhope2012/SGrice4. I'm going for a running PR in honor of this darling girl and her incredible family. 

It's all been a lot for me, emotionally, and instead of processing it I have been shutting down and being very hermit-y. Also, my weight loss has completely stalled and I'd love to say that I just can't figure out what the problem is but frankly, I'm working out less and eating (and drinking) more. No excuses. I haven't been doing what I know works to get more weight off.

The night I accepted the Presidency of the Chicago Chapter of Les Dames d'Escoffier at the Ritz Carlton in Chicago. With two good friends, Candance Barocci Warner and Nancy Brussat. One of the biggest milestones of my career.

I keep reiterating to people that the pursuit of fitness, health and weight loss has nothing to do with motivation and everything to do with the desire to change, which I still 100 percent stand by and believe, but lately, the change apparently has been less important to me. I am still stuck at just over 200 pounds (207.4 to be exact) and I haven't been under 200 pounds in 20 years. WHY CAN'T I KEEP GOING TO GET UNDER 200? I don't know, but I am on a mission to not only figure out what my issue is (so I am back to going to therapy once a week rather than once every two weeks) but also to kick it back into gear to get under than damn number. I know, I know. It's not about the number but how you feel, etc. I KNOW. But it is about THIS number for me. I have some sort of mental block about getting under 200 pounds and I need to figure it the hell out!

At the 2011 Batavia Triathlon. The 2012 Triathlon is June 10 this year. I can't wait to see how I do 60 pounds lighter! With Meg and Liz.

So, to help me to this, I am going to take a page from a weight loss blogger I admire (The Anti-Jared) and I am going to post my weight daily (YES, DAILY) as well as a short blog post about how it's going until my birthday on July 3. I want to lose 8 pounds as the ultimate 38th birthday to myself and I feel like this will keep me accountable, and help me process all of the nuttiness in my life by doing something that is very therapeutic for me (writing).

Your encouragement, posts, tweets, texts, emails and calls are welcomed and encouraged. I need my incredible support system to help me accomplish this next huge goal. I know 8 pounds doesn't seem like a lot, but it is to me and will get me to a goal I've been dreaming about for 20 years.

So today is day one of the daily weight loss blog. Weight: 207.4. I mean, I lost 52 pounds in 14 weeks doing Fat Chef so I can do this, right? RIGHT?

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