Selfish and Selfless Acts

It's been a week since the bombings in Boston and so many people have written so many beautiful things about the people there, the city itself and horrific tragedy that it was. I've thought so much about it this week and about selfish acts. Yes, the bombers were selfish, but I don't really want to talk about them. They've been covered enough. I want to talk about the other selfish people...the runners. We're selfish people. We spend a lot of time away from loved ones to train for races. We spend a lot of money on clothes, gadgets and race entries. We wake up the people we share a bed with, sloppily pulling on running clothes at 5:30 a.m. We talk incessantly about pace times, chafing and shoe fittings. We put running above a lot of things. The selfishness of running is a positive kind of selfish...it's motivating, it's healthy, and it's fun (most of the time) but it's selfish nonetheless.

The people who support us, deal with all of our stinking, sweaty clothes, smile and nod when we excitedly talk about negative splits and most importantly stand at the finish line and cheer louder than anyone else when we plod into the finish are the selfless ones. They are supportive, happy and encouraging. They stand and wait, and wait, and wait for that 30 seconds of yelling and sign waving for that last beautiful moment at the finish line. They wipe our tears when our runs suck, rub our calves when they're sore and get us water, ice and Aleve when we can't get off the couch after a long run. I can't imagine how the runners at the Boston Marathon feel about the supporters who died last Monday. Especially the dad who lost his little guy who just wanted to cheer for his Superman of a dad doing a race I could only dream about doing. I just can't imagine.

My biggest supporter and the love of my life. 

I have been back to running for a month now and each day I improve, and each day I am more and more grateful for every step, for all of my supporters, especially my husband, and for the work it takes to get back into fighting shape. Yes, that moment of selfishness on our part to achieve a goal is worth all of the pain and I know that for the supporters that moment of selflessness to see the person you love accomplish something they've been working toward is worth all of the bullshit they have to put up with. I know that because I've been on both sides. But how can those who lost loved ones or had loved ones hurt in that bombing think it was worth it?

If you want to donate to The One Fund Boston, please go to: https://onefundboston.org/

I know running will always been worth it for me. It's all I dreamed about when I was immobile with my broken ankle. I never thought I would appreciate running as much as I do now since my accident. I hope, someday, that those affected by the bombings will come to appreciate it again, too. I am running in a memorial run tonight with the running community where I live and those Boston Marathon runners and supporters will be in my heart.